Oakley 20 v’s The Beast from the East Jnr

Oakley 0, Beast from the East Jnr 1 

So today’s the day! whoop! all set for the longest run of my life and I was going to be doing it … wait for it ….. with other people, not by myself!, this was the run that was going to give me the confidence to go into the marathon’s knowing I could actually make it round and finish upright and very possibly alive! the very last day of running an almighty run before I could taper things off a bit and eat pizza carb load like a true athlete.

I just KNOW you’re all wondering how I prepped for this run aren’t you?! mentally, physically, I know you’re dying to know my secret and I’m happy to share them with you .. for free, no purchase required, just take a seat, relax and I’ll tell you all about it ….

I did nothing .. that’s right nothing, nada, zip, zilch, f**k all, I ran a half marathon a week ago and sat on my expanding nether regions for the next 6 days …. clearly this was just to rest my legs you understand, but actually I was just being lazy and possibly a bit smug and definitely very stupid but its OK because it was only 6.9 miles more than last weekend, or 4 miles further than the longest run that nearly broke me but pah! how hard could it be? … a week off? I could still run it no problems… right? … I’ve tooooootally got this! So let’s add a new dimension here, lets look at hydration .. say it with me folks …HY-DRA-TION, our bodies are made up of 60% water, if the balance is out even by 1% it can have an adverse affect on you, now add in a fair few double G&T’s and a glass of wine the night before a 20 mile distance you’ve never done before and yeeeeaah ….. it was never going to be a pretty picture now was it.

So! when Terror Tot woke me up at 5.30am this morning, the first thing I did in my sleep deprived, hungover state was grab my phone and look at the Oakley FaceBook page and oh! the relief I felt to see it had been cancelled was almost enough to raise a smile … almost!  Yes! the weatherman had got it right and the dumping of snow that was forecast actually happened. Result!  But as the 3rd (or 4th) strong coffee of the morning started to sink in, my relief turned to astonishment, then disbelief, then sorrow and finally disgust. WTF was I actually thinking last night? – who in their right minds has a fair few alcoholic drinks before running a distance you’ve never run before just because there was the “possibility” the run would be cancelled .. nerves? stupidity? I honestly and genuinely have no idea what possessed me but in the cold light of day I have to concede that it was stupid and fool hardy.  If it wasn’t so icy outside I’d head out for an “angry run” but that would probably be the 2nd most stupid thing I’ve done in the space of 24 short little hours.

The most annoying thing is … I keep looking at the clock and thinking “I’d be at the 10k mark by now” or “I would be halfway round now” and “in about 20 mins when I look at the clock again I reckon I would’ve finished it” … it would have been over in 3-4 little hours, it would’ve been tough, I’m sure it would’ve hurt and I would’ve been sitting here now feeling damn proud of myself  ….. instead of totally destroyed and wallowing in my own self induced pity.

So now I guess I have a choice to make …. 5 weeks until London, 7 weeks until MK – to defer or to keep going? End this journey now? or see where it takes me? Is there enough time to pull things back? can I get a long run in before I should start to taper? Right now, this very moment in time, I want to throw the towel in BUT! I’ve always worked on the ethos of, in 3 or 6 months time what would I regret more? not doing it, or doing it knowing that it’s going to hurt .. a lot, and live with the fact that it wouldn’t hurt as much if I’d put the effort in in the first place?  I guess you don’t come THIS far, just to get THIS far.

If I was a more adult-like adult, I wouldn’t have chosen to do this journey the way I’ve done it.. but this is me… love it, like it, hate it, laugh at it .. this is how I roll.  Crazy, stubborn, determined … all words that have been used to define me over the passed 9 months and all words I feel like I need to live up to now.  I’ve never been a quitter, it’s not in my genes not to finish what I started and I sure as hell wasn’t built to let people down!

I try and teach my kids never to give up, to keep on going until that rather rotund lady sings …. well she hasn’t sung yet … at least not in tune…. which must mean that I keep going until she can hold her notes a bit better right?

I make no promises.

Until next time

SM xx

 


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